New Moon’s Jacob and Bella at my Tofino singing pebble South Beach Part 1

Image of Wikaninnish Beach from the Wikaninnish Centre, the log you can see, looking like a matchstick, was enormous.

Despite being old enough to know better, I was rather looking forward to seeing Twilight sequel New Moon this weekend. Martin, it has to be said, was less so, but like a very good BF, he accompanied me there on Friday night. I know for a fact he didn’t enjoy it (no sense of romance, damn man), but even he sat up in his seat, nudged me and said, Hey, that’s Tofino! when then beach scenes came on.

Tofino is a small town on the Western coast of Vancouver Island, literally at the very end of the road, in the heart of the Pacific Rim National Park. We headed there on a roadtrip from the Canadian mainland two years ago and it is GORGEOUS. I can’t even begin to describe how incredible the coastline it is, trails through lush green forest, the Pacific pounding on the most amazingly unique beaches, bog forests, giant trees, upturned roots the size of caravans tossed onto the shore.

Not too difficult to see why the location scouts for New Moon picked this area and particularly the magical South Beach for the scene where Jacob has rescued Bella : http://www.westcoaster.ca/modules/AMS/article.php?storyid=6384/ Though clearly she wasn’t dressed as below when he rescued her.

The crew and cast had driven across Vancouver Island from Nanaimo, just as we did. I’ve been meaning to do a blog post with some of the photographs I took, and now seems like a topical time for it!

Map of the central part of Vancouver Island, we landed at Nanaimo, bottom right, and drove across the 4BC to Tofino at the end of the red road! 1/2 day trip, with stops

The ferry to Nanaimo to Vancouver Island landed around lunchtime, we picked up the hire car and set off for the drive across the island. Stopped off at Coombes market (bonkers), took in the Cathedral Trail, then had a halfway break at the magnificent Taylor River (see “You Are Here” above!).

A spot of giant tree hugging for me on the Cathedral Trail

Tayor River - this was what I imagine Canadian rivers to be like, perfect!

Back into the car for the second leg (behind Canadian drivers who all do 40mph even if there is NO traffic) on the long road to Tofino, we were looking forward to getting to Water’s Edge. It had looked to die for on the web-site, and didn’t disappoint…

Water's Edge guest house at Tofino. Think hot tub, fresh air, Bloody Mary - heaven

Sunset at Water's Edge, Tofino

We had three nights at Tofino, so only two and a half days to pack in every view, beach, sight and eatery between the town itself and Ucluelet. That’s a lot to see, but as we had a Pacific Rim National Park map, an excellent driver (Mart) and a bossy navigator (me), how could we fail?

The Tofino beaches, surely we weren't going to attempt them all?! And the Bog trail. And Ucluelet. And you will notice that South Beach isn't even on there....

Well, I’m telling you, it’s possible. And not just possible, but enjoyable. Ok, you need to be quite fit, but I had a bad back at the time and had to take it fairly easy, so if I could do it….

We set out first thing and did the 2km Rainforest Trail on the road from Tofino to Ucluelet, a wonderful figure of eight walk through densely packed moist forest, giant cedar trees, moss frond, both imposing and magical.

The Rainforest Trail, Pacific Rim National Park

Then we headed over to Ucluelet, which is not that fab really (you’d have to be Uclueless to stay there arf arf) , but the Wild Pacific trail there was pretty spectacular, tracing the coastline with panoramic views out to what’s known locally, because of all the shipwrecks, as the Graveyard of the Pacific. Took about two hours with photos and a visit to the lighthouse.

The Wild Pacific Trail at Ucluelet: view over the Graveyard of the Pacific

Red Bull required to give me wings before next trail after fall on rocks and HUGE bump on arm appeared

We hopped back in the car and headed to the Willowbrae Trail to walk through the forest to Florencia Bay and Half Moon Bay. The former is named after the ship-wrecked brigantine Florencia which finally splintered on the islet in the bay and the bay is known for it’s long sandy beach and misty mornings. I liked the latter, a shorter beach surrounded by trees, with a rope swing and a bald eagle’s massive nest complete with chick. Did take an age to get there though as the lady ahead of us hadn’t taken a walk in a while….

Very slow Willowbrae Trail due to very large bottoms ahead, I was laughing hence camera shake

The beautifully rugged Florencia Bay

Crab sunbathes on Florencia Bay, Tonfino

Now THAT'S a tree root, just casually washed up on shore!

Half Moon bay, with the rope swing at the far end. Very brave spruce trees growing right on the edge of the Pacific Ocean.

Being watched by a bald eagle. I got so excited whenever we saw one, which was often, they are everywhere!

Taking a breather. I'd like to say we built this,but I'd be lying, our schedule didn't allow for random construction on visited beaches

My lovely man watching the bald eagle

It was late afternoon by this time, no time for another trail so we headed back towards Tofino for a hot tub at Water’s Edge. As you can probably tell from the picture above, Mart needs feeding regularly, it’s a little like having a large alsatian, but I persuaded him to take a quick detour up to check out the view from Radar Hill, so named as it had a small radar station perched upon it during World War II. You can see more of the panoramic views from this hill at http://www.gotofino.com/tofinohikingtrailsradarhill.html.

Late afternoon view from Radar Hill

I can’t believe I haven’t got to South Beach yet, this post has got longer and longer as the blinkin pictures are so lovely!

More tomorrow

You can read more about Tofino here -http://www.vancouverisland.com/Regions/towns/?townID=28

Watch the official trailer for New Moon here, never mind the vampires, the very first shot is one of the Tofino beaches:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYBF3HKzrmE

He will have a bloody injury if he doesn’t get out of my office

I have had many injuries over the last few years and him indoors has always been wonderful. Fetching, carrying, shopping, cleaning, cooking. Actually, no, not cooking, what am I talking about?! I did that even when my hands were red raw with granulomas, wearing gloves. He knows better than to try and take over in my kitchen anyway, likely to get his fingers chopped off with a giant cleaver.

A typical 'Granuloma' on my hand, bloody itchy, bloody sore

So yesterday when I got the call to dash to accident & emergency as some idiot had opened their car door right in the path of my man’s 23mph-bombing-through-Rusholme bicycle, I sped over there in bestest Florence Nightingale mode.

Incidentally, these are the top ten ways to have a bike / car coupling, his was Number 2:

http://www.coolbiking.com/blog/cycling/cycling-tips/top-ten-ways-to-be-hit-by-a-car-while-on-a-bike/

Whilst waiting for x-rays, he told me that he’d been bounced in between a car and a van when the door opened, Ooooo just like Brad Pitt I said, and got a dirty look.

Brad takes a tumble in Hollywood, slightly different to being wapped by a Nissan door on the curry mile

I coo-ed, stroked his shoulders, and made all the right GF noises, but as soon as the lovely nurse had ascertained there was no break, I really couldn’t take anymore of the projectile vomiting Somalian lady opposite and we were outta there. I even got him Chinese food and Peroni on the way home. Top girlfriend. So does it make me a truly bad person that it’s less that 24hrs later and I’ve had enough of  his injury already?

He keeps coming in my office (warm) from outside (cold) and leaving the door open. Telling me he’s bored. I am finding him things that he can do with one hand. No comments on that one please. And the arm injury seems to have affected his brain, he just went out for bird seed and mushrooms. Two items. And came back without the mushrooms. He was supposed to be on nights so I would have had the whole bed to myself and slept in fabulous full sprawl mode. But I can’t be annoyed with him because he’s an injured soldier. And I love him.

Please Lord, let there be a miraculous recovery soon, as I am being forced to recognise that I have not got the type of personality to be patient with patients.

Rose Cottage 25 Nov – Choosing the opaque glass for bathroom windows

How do you make a decision on how the replacement window's glass will look when the current bathroom is making you vomit?!

There are a tonne of decisions to be made on any house renovation, and if you aren’t that experienced then these decisions should be made (a) before the job starts and then (b) stuck to, thus ensuring few increases in costs and a smooth running contract. One advantage of having a project manager / interior designer is that they are used to making all these decisions and should  be able to make them quickly and competently, because mostly, they’ve seen it all before. I’ve had clients who chop n change their minds and won’t make decision until it’s way too late, and it’s just a nightmare, costs rocket, and tempers fray.

Today’s decision (well, one of them!) at Rose Cottage is all about windows and the type of glass to choose. All the damaged and faulty upvc windows are being replaced with custom made timber frames, with the smaller ones – the bathroom, the top of the stairs, and the two in the living area having four panes of glass as below. The bathroom window will have an opener, one vertical the full height, and the other three (top & bottom of stairs & under the stairs) are fixed.

This window is where the dining area will be, tucked under the stairs

The two smaller windows on the ground floor face out onto the road / areas where people can walk, so we need to bear in mind privacy otherwise nosey parkers will be watching Hannah scoffing her muesli every morning, security so passers-by aren’t checking out what’s in the house, and also light as we don’t want blinds to be permanently closed due to the first two factors.

Tommy, who is now busy making the windows (we couldn’t order the windows until we had listed building approval and then of course as soon as we got it, it was all systems go Go GO!), has asked for a decision to be made immediately on the pattern for this opaque glass, and for the windows to be guaranteed the glass has to be from the Pilkington range. We checked firstly with the Listed Building team to check there was no recommendation from them, and the answer was no, which really surprised me. I found it strange that they were concerned with the appearance of , for example, a 4″x12″ ventilation duct which was going in the external wall, but weren’t fussed if we chose the most hideously patterned glass, and believe me, there were some which just did not float our Georgian cottage boat…….

Arctic, Digital, Mayflower, Taffeta and Everglade - No,no,no,no,no

So back to the drawing board, or back on the web and I checked out the Oriel collection from Pilkington, but these were far too busy, and the client called them grannyish:

Brocade, Laurel, Ravenna, Canterbury

So what to do? A few years ago I renovated a house where the large North facing sash windows faced onto the street and the students in the house opposite could gaze into the room, which was going to be my bedroom, not good. So I had a company make cut some window film to the size of the window, with an oval cut pattern. ‘Scuse the dire temporary curtains below, I haven’t many images of this house, pre the digital age! The film was fantastic, we didn’t have to close the curtains during the day, yet the room was still light and private.

North-facing sash windows with Brume window film for privacy

For Rose Cottage, the client was concerned that this film would look too modern, but this image showed her that it really would work with the Georgian style cross timber windows:

Image from www.brume.co.uk

So we’ve decided on physical sand-blasting to the downstairs smaller windows to emulate this look above, and this will be done to the Pilkington toughened glass before the windows are fitted, as they come complete. I think with the right dressing inside they will look lovely.

For the bathroom, we’ve asked Tommy to leave all the panes clear, not because the client is a naughty exhibitionist, but because I’d like to use window film on just the bottom two panes, as no-one except Spiderman would be able to see in the top two. It might be nice to have a delicate pattern on these lower panes to fit with the shabby chic feel for the interior:

www.interiorplace.com But what on earth were they thinking with the whole over-turned bin view??! Pattern a bit too grannyish again?

www.brume.co.uk - Let's go dotty?

www.dotmaison.com by Emma Jeffs - funky but still shabby chic!

Decisions ticked for today then, just got the problem of the front elevation collapsing now……

Katie Price = a how-not-to guide in break-up etiquette

"Hey, kids, said Katie, this is your new daddy, far left" - wtf were you thinking??!!

Watching Katie Price and her antics over this last few months, I don’t think it’s any great surprise that the public have turned so obviously against her this week on I’m A Celebrity. It must be pretty tough for one who seems so reliant on the  love of her public to accept, but I don’t reckon it’s just wanting to ’see more of her’ which has made the phone lines ring off the hook and line her up for trial after bug-crunching trial.

Katie has been and still appears to be blind to the fact that her all too apparent self-absorbtion over the last few months – her cringe-worthy crotch displays in Ibiza, her immediate declaration of love for a cross dressing cage fighting try-sexual, her enthusiasm that her children watch her cavorting with said same weirdo in public parks when the kids must have been really just wondering where their dad was, her determination to move on super fast even though it was quite clearly damaging to her emotionally and probably to the children too – just made people speculate that her husband was probably better off without her and understand why he’d left her in the first place! I was watching last night when she dumped Alex live on tv (that’s no more Daddy No2, kids, or god no, he wasn’t ‘Uncle’ Alex was he?), and rabbited on about Pete, and ‘apologised’ for behaving badly and it just made me think – damage limitation exercise. Though why anyone would involve Michelle Heaton in damage limitation is beyond comprehension.

PICTURE BY : BAKER - BRIDGER / MATRIXPHOTOS.COM

And then this morning I got an email from a friend, a bright, go-getting, enthusiastic girl working very hard to build her business and doing brilliantly at it, asking if I had any media contacts for a specific project. After a bit of an email chat, she wrote this:

“I am just going for it to be honest Sian…I’ve got nothing to lose, so I might as well.  And plus, my ex-boyfriend (who basically said that I would never amount to anything with my business), gets the pleasure of seeing my name all over the place…ha ha ha!”

I though this was fantastic! Instead of moping, or feeling viciously vindictive, or obsessing about what could have been, she’d picked herself up, dusted herself off and thought “Bollocks to you! I am going to succeed and make something of myself.” It wasn’t negative or attacking, it wasn’t about causing her ex-BF pain, it was about showing him, in a classy, stylish and professional way, EXACTLY what he’d lost. Not getting her boobs out in Ibiza and putting it on Facebook. Not getting a taller new BF with bigger muscles in the warped hope her ex would feel belittled. But the sort of revenge that brings personal satisfaction, being the stronger person, rising above the insults and bettering yourself, because that, in the long run, will make you feel a whole hell of a lot better about yourself.

When my ex-BF and I split up we had a business together, and it was very VERY difficult. It was acrimonious, angry and bitter, we thought we hated each other, but of course in hindsight, we should have just split personally and professionally about 3 years before we did. In my opinion, he behaved appallingly, on many levels, but I also had my moments. However his choice, whilst we were still running our business together, of a new girlfriend who was a porn star and to set up their very own triple x web-site really was the last straw for me. That kinda tipped me right over the edge at the time. I’m an old fashioned girl. How do you carry on running a business when you feel utterly defeated every time you go into work. Well, you just do. Because you have to. And right about the same time, when everything was in my name, the business, the house, the lot, I had to make a decision. Do I tell him to get stuffed, sell everything, pocket the £100k, disappear and start again? Or do I go to the bank, write a cheque for his half and mentally wash my hands of him? Be able to look myself in the mirror when all the water had flowed under the bridge and know I did the ‘right’ thing? Supported by amazing friends and family, I did the right thing. I wrote the cheque. Poorer, but what goes around comes around eh?

And then, almost immediately, came a really bizarre opportunity. To go on a brand new Channel 4 show called Property Ladder, which was featuring wannabe developers. I could do that, I thought. And just like my friend earlier, I wanted my name to be everywhere, but for the right reasons, striving to make a success of my business, of myself. I wanted him, our friends, work colleagues, associates to see I was nothing like my ex and his revolting girlfriend, that I was a hard worker and a good business woman and not, in any way, a dirty girty Of course, I never told Property Ladder the real reason why I’d agreed to the filming, to do the show, and I didn’t humiliate my ex on national television, because that wasn’t my aim. It was about me making my stamp on the world.

So what’s my point? In a break-up, there is always the temptation to behave appallingly, to hurt the other person, to get revenge, to use the kids as a weapon, to take all those steps into actions which are just, ultimately, pointless. Because they just don’t benefit you at all.

When Peter Andre left Katie Price she could have lifted her head up high and done her damndest to grow her business, her self esteem and self worth. Made him wonder why in the hell he’d left her! Shown him she had self-respect, how proud she was of herself, dedicated her time to her kids, written another book, anything constructive and positive. Going into I’m A Celebrity was just that, and could have been perfect but it came 6 months to late, the damage had already been done.

It’s so tough when you’re right slap bang in the middle of a break-up, but if this is happening to you, remember that life is a marathon and not a sprint, and if you make the right decisions, ones which are honourable and good and respectful of the other person, no matter how much they have disrespected you, you will emerge the better person. It’s a fact.

Rose Cottage – 24 Nov Knock through to kitchen complete

Ground floor view - living room to kitchen

This is, for me, by far and away the most exciting time of any development – the ripping out of all the hideous ‘before’ stuff and opening up the house or apartment or building back to bare brick. Once thats done, you really get a feel for a space, and therefore also the potential of a space. Even perfectly proportioned and measured drawings can’t give you the feeling you get when you are actually on site and walking round a place, it’s only then you truly sense how it should and will be lived in.

Rose Cottage is only tiny, so the wall in between the living room and kitchen cut the ground floor very much in two, and the areas didn’t feel connected at all. The initial idea was to take the whole wall you see above out, to have one big open space, but a combination of factors changed our mind. One was the specification of a long freestanding sink unit which will sit on the opposite side of the blank white wall on the left, in the kitchen – meaning the sink would have been in the middle of the room. Not perfect design wise. Another was that the client liked some element of open plan through to the kitchen, but didn’t want to see the ‘messy bits’ from the living room. Another was that the listed building department preferred the idea of an extended opening rather than a full knock through, although they hadn’t said a definite ‘no’.

So this is the compromise:

Steel Universal Beam (UB) in place, extending the original doorway to form a new opening

From this vantage point, where the sofa will eventually be, the client will see / have a dining area under the stairs, a vintage dresser on the wall moreorless where the yellow spirit level is and the fridge will be on the far wall in the corner. TV wall mounted on the white wall with partially stripped paper.

The ground floor therefore has the advantage of open plan, a flow from living to kitchen with space now for a dining area and that all important country cottage dresser, but also the benefit of a separate feel and the dirty pots behind a wall, so the client can forget all about them whilst she settles down for a bit of telly after dinner

The listed cottage Shabby Palace FINALLY takes centre stage

Image courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/94835348@N00/3578311383/

Rose Cottage pre-listing, maybe 1960's?

My god, anyone would think that we’d proposed changes to Manchester Town Hall, the length of time it’s taken to get a final agreement from the Listed Building department, maybe lopping a handful of gargoyles off or popping a glass extension on the Albert Square frontage. Instead, all we want to do is restore a gorgeous little Georgian cottage, hidden in the heart of Fallowfield, bastardised over many years and neglected by the very same department who’ve made life really rather tough for the cottage’s owner this last five months.

Rose Cottage as it is now, with plastic windows, the upvc bathroom window to the centre first floor, and soil / waste pipes from the bathroom slap down the centre of the house. Can do the same angle as above a a large concrete wall has replaced the small wooden fence!

I understand the process, the ‘rules’, but when the ceiling purlins and the chimney are almost collapsing, how hard can it be to give the go ahead on these essential works instead of a ‘comprehensive PPG15 statement’ being drafted, written, corrected, reviewed, vetted and approved? And then give misleading guidance and drag things out so the owner has to pay an extra 5 month mortgage payments, eating further into funds on top of the extra work. Why didn’t the listed building people at the council know that over the previous 30 years such changes had occurred to this building under their remit? If the windows to most of the other cottages in the row have been changed to upvc, why suddenly now insist this owner replaces with timber, yet not address any of the others?

Lesson learnt for future clients (if I see a listed building pre-purchase) : always get the listed building team in your area out before you have exchanged and agreed a price, to ensure the current owner hasn’t bypassed the rules and done works they weren’t allowed to do. Once the LB team have seen the property, it’s the property owner’s obligation to pay for works required, so as a buyer you are in a great bargaining position. Unfortunately here the client only got the LB team in after she’d bought, so the financial ball was by then firmly bouncing in her court.

It’s taken so much longer than it should have done, and of course, that doesn’t cost the council employees a penny, so they’re in no rush. We’re not talking multi-millionaire property developers here either, my client is just a girl who fell in love with an unloved cottage and wanted to make it perfect again. I can see why people say avoid listed buildings like the plague, it’s not the buildings which are the problem, it’s the bureaucrats controlling them. The system is bonkers, it should be encouraging people to take on such projects, not putting every obstacle in their way!

Aaaanyway, the permission came in at the beginning of this week. We can stop the chimney and roof collapsing and killing anyone by putting in some steel beams, we can strap the front elevation back to the internal walls to stop it ending up in the garden, we can install a damp proof course to put and end to the relentless moisture, we can rip out the hideousness of the interior and start again, and we can install new bespoke timber windows which will look a million times better than the upvc but have upped the financial ante. Yes, I know, aren’t these things in the best interest of the house and shouldn’t it have taken about seven minutes to agree them? Don’t be silly, that would be sensible.

I’ve been far too busy blogging about lunatic tenants this week to give Rose Cottage her rightful attention, but that all changes now, and the Shabby Palace is going to take centre stage for a few weeks……

This link gives you some of the pictures I took of the horrendous original interior -http://moregeous.wordpress.com/2009/08/17/poor-rose-cottage/

Some scary pictures of steel going in and toppling chimneys to follow, I love this bit!!

I think the tenant traumas are over for this week, a few new people in and out over the next month or so, always interesting, getting to know them. Had a great night at the Virgin gym the other night with the inimitable John Thomson compering for the Genesis Appeal. It doubled up as a celebration 8yrs to the night me & my other half met. Doesn’t time fly when you are working your nuts off.

Abandoned by a grubby Jennifer Aniston: Part II The voicemail

Original post: http://moregeous.wordpress.com/2009/11/17/my-poor-flat-abandoned-by-the-grubby-jennifer-aniston/

So to continue the saga, yesterday afternoon as the abandoned flat was facing the Power of the Cif, I noticed Scottish G had called me. I didn’t call back. Then I got a friendly text: ” Could you ring me when u get this!”

I texted back “Please don’t call back, I know Mart called you as he was furious but I really want to move on. He won’t call again.”

At this point I was unaware that Mart had asked Scottish G to make a contribution for damage and cleaning. I spoke to Mart and he told me G said he’d send £30. Yeh, right, like he paid the rent and deposit.

I got another text “Ring me now its nothing 2 do with martin hes actually a sound guy ring me for a sec!”

Hmmmm. This smells fishy, the texts are far too nice, and he has NEVER before wanted to speak to me so badly but always avoided calls. Has he read the blog? What would you think?

I replied: “Please don’t text again. I don’t want your money. Keep it and good luck.”

The tone instantly changed: “Y u not ringing me ur mouth almighty b4???”

Then in comes the voicemail. It is hysterical, without pauses and here is an exact transcript:

“ Oh your story’s changed now, innt it, you’ll no f*g ring me will ya… You better get your story removed off the internet now, you f * g silly SLAG, because listen, the whole Jennifer Aniston shit, I had been sitting out there for four f *g hours so I did look shit, and I hadn’t even finished doing my make-up, and you see once I am done up properly I could steal your husband from under your feet cause you’re nothing but an ugly little BASTARD and you’re a real girl and d’you know I was texting Martin earlier, to try and get the money for the flat, cause I know, I didn’t even know about heels to the floor, about the holes to the floor, so I was trying to get money and that together, but you see now, you won’t get a f*g penny, and as for forwarding to emails to ma work, what the f*k’s it got to do with ma work? Ah you’ll no ring me back now, I swear to God, if ma mum gets adrift of ya, you’ll f*g get bounced up and down the street, you silly little COW, move on, you were texting me yesterday, listen, you better ring me back now, because that story better get removed from the internet and I better see it. I’ve had people reading me up from work and reading me that and the picture of the f*g dirty underwear in the drawer, well, the reason I never took that love, is cause that was already there when I f*g moved in, exactly, so your flat wasna all f*g clean, and that was already there, so dinna f*g write lies about me, love”

OK. The blog has been read. I am wondering about the whole email thing as I didn’t send any to his work, or ex-work. Hmmm again. I naturally also fear for my relationship as Scottish G is primed like a heat seeking missile to whisk Mart away from me.

I text: “As I said, don’t call back. I write a blog, that’s my perogative, and it’s the true story of what happens to me as a landlord. If tenants behave appallingly and barefaced lie to me, and leave my flats in a disgraceful state as you did, it goes on there. I am calling the police about your threats and abuse.” I’d hoped that would be an end to it. No such luck.

A tirade of texts followed with various insults; face like a smacked arse, sad lonely insecure bitch etc. And I felt a bit bad, after all, I think he makes a fabulous girl; tall, slim, lovely bone structure, just a shame about the potty mouth and inability to face up to responsibilities.

However I did take his name off the blog, not sure why. And that of his friend as it wasn’t really any of his fault. Even though his friend then made a comment on the blog with his name on it?!!

But the bigger question is why should I remove them? Do I have the right to write about my life and my day and my work as it happens? If people don’t like reading about their behaviour and what they do, then maybe they should behave a bit bloody better. Same with Mart’s ex and her hideous behaviour. Should I be allowed to write about that? It brings into question what is private and what isn’t? And those are very big questions. If someone behaves badly, should I have the right to blog it and name and shame, or not?

It’s a buggar this internet blog thing, isn’t it?

My poor flat – abandoned by a grubby Jennifer Aniston

I loved this woman, it was Team Aniston all the way, until recently.....

So, as you can perhaps tell from the title of this blog post, I am not best pleased with Scottish G, my, as of yesterday, ex-tenant.

And it’s my own stupid fault. He worked in a local spa I go to, was desperate for somewhere to stay, cue sob story about how awful his flatmate was, and I thought his job was secure…… Suuuuuckerrrrrrrrrr!

So he moved in, three days after he was supposed to and allegedly still waiting for his deposit money back. He immediately proceeds to piss off all the other tenants by playing crappy rave toons until all hours even during the week,  clearly off his knickers as he didn’t then bother  going to work the next day – easy to call him at work when the number’s on your speed dial for waxing . He chucks his fag ends out of every window, even though there’s no smoking. His various paramours stay and coquettishly bar the door every time I go round. Then the rat dog moves in, which sounded like one of those ridiculous Paris Hilton type things, even though we don’t allow pets. He constantly ‘loses’ his phone.

Two months go by and he pays his rent in dribs and drabs, so time consuming, annoying and stressful given the current economic climate to have to chase constantly. His lovely friend M even pays when Scottish G is nowhere to be seen. Yes, yes, I know, my own fault, I should never have let him move in!

And then one day he telephones, around lunch time, and in the wettest voice imaginable says “Ooooo Sian, I’m loucked ooooot, can you come let ma an?” When we got there, I was on the phone in the passenger seat and asked Mart if he’d do the honours. So out he got and returned a few short minutes later. The car didn’t move. I looked up from my addictive iPhone and saw Mart’s face. Staring forward, chin up and with a wry smile creeping up around the edges of his mouth.

“What’s up?” Silence. “What is it??” Mart looked at me, “Oh, you are so going to wish you just went in there.”

Now I’m intrigued. Attention totally off Twitter. “Ok, you got me, why?”

“Well, I got to the front door and Scottish G’s friend M was there with his hand out for the keys. My keys. So I said I’d open the door and walked past him down the corridor, and you know you can’t see the door to his flat from the front, until you get to it? Well, I got to it and put the key out to the door, and there was someone standing in the shadows to my right near the cellar door. I glanced and it was a girl so I just kind of said ‘alright’ not really twigging and thinking she was a friend of M’s. Then I twigged and looked again, and said ‘ G ?’. Full makeup, long poker straight wig and black lacy underwear!!! And d’you know what he said?! ‘Oooo Martin, I bet yoooo guessed I dad thas, dinna ya?’ I couldn’t believe it, he thinks he’s Jennifer Aniston! So I opened the door, and off he minced down the tiled hall, his stilettos clicking on the tiles!”

He was right, I did wish I’d gone in – I get dead bodies, Mart gets cross-dressers. And Mart was horrified when I asked “Could you see his willy?” exclaiming ‘I didn’t look!” in his best manly voice. But the very best was when I texted Rip Rap (dad and caretaker): “Dad, you will not believe what just happen with Scottish G from No 2!”

And the text back from my 70yr old father “You mean the trannie?” The buggar hadn’t even mentioned it – I’m sacking him as caretaker, he can’t even be bothered to gossip! He never even goes to Manchester city centre, how does he know what a trannie is?!

And then I find out he now works behind the bar in a lap dancing club, in full Jennifer regalia, and within a matter of weeks, surprise surprise, he’s no longer the receptionist at the spa. He’s moreorless up to date with his rent by now, as I’d agreed with him and his boss that £500 of his wages got paid direct to me last week, phewf. He agrees to pay the final £115 to take him up to the end Nov last weekend, but of course, doesn’t answer his phone, won’t answer the door, and the law is so pro-tenant and anti-landlord what can you do? (but yeh yeh it’s my own fault for having been too nice in the first place!)

Then the text. ‘Sorry Sian, but I’ve gone back to Scotland and left the flat’. So we went in the flat and the place was a disgrace. What a surprise. I texted him to say thanks so much for the state of the flat and the slap in the face, and amongst other things was told that he didn’t have a hoover (one in the hall), he was paid up (no, actually and no notice as per his contract) and I was sad as all I had was my houses and no friends?! And he’d left me some presents, soooo lovely:

Present No 1 - some attractive black mould as he had never bothered opening a window or wiping the window cills. He claims to have cleaned every two days.....

Present No2 - my personal favourite, a broken glass full of dimps

Present No 3 - discarded black stockings and sweaty pink bed socks. G now says these were here when he moved in. And he kept them, why??!

Present No 4, now this is thoughtful - a tip and some pubes for me being such a nice landlady!

It’s funny isn’t it, that some tenants think because you own (ie have mortgaged) some properties, that you are rolling in it, and don’t struggle like everyone else. If just a few don’t pay the rent i.e. rightly pay for where they live, where you LET them live, and your business collapses, then not only do you lose your livelihood (and believe me there ain’t no profits being made right now), but also all of your tenants could lose the places they have made home. I am proud to be a landlord and I work hard to provide nice homes for people to live in, but people like Scottish G REALLY try my patience!

Bloody supermarkets – Sainsburys should find their own errant trolleys!

 

http://www.flickr.com/photos/pigstyave/38315743/

I just got the below email, sent to a whole host of police, community liaison bods, councillors and residents in our local mainly student area.

Dear All,

It would appear Sainsbury’s have a huge problem with shopping trolleys going missing year on year, despite trying very hard to get people to leave them within the vicinity of their Fallowfield store .
As they are unsightly left in our residential areas of Withington and Old Moat, can anybody who does see a trolley lying in nearby roads, alleys, or indeed in somebody’s front garden etc etc…
please report them direct to Sainsburys store on the contact no as follows :  0161 256 0490
Please try and give the details of an accurate road/address and description of exactly where they are so they can be picked up in conjuntion with Sainsbury’s staff as easily as possible.
e.g  In front garden of 45 Egerton Road                  or          in the alleyway between Booth Avenue close to the Derby Road junction.
Could I also request to anybody reporting a missing trolley please ensure they report it direct to Sainsbury’s and not to Jan Teece our Street Environmental Manger as it will create a lot more more work for an already very busy Jan.
On that note Jan has already reported over a dozen trolleys already which she has found in a relatively short period of time which is already fantastic work on her behalf !
Many thanks for your co-operation in this matter.
Regards
Dave Carey
MCC Community Safety Coordinator

It annoyed me quite a bit, so I sent one back.

As someone who shops at Sainsbury’s Fallowfield and watches the lazy shoppers walk across Wilmslow Road or up out of the car park with their full trolleys, wouldn’t it be useful for the supermarket to invest some of their excellent recently advertised profits to employ security staff who aren’t visually challenged, reading the paper or  gossiping with other staff as they so often are! Then maybe they’d notice the trolleys being wheeled away?!

And then public resources wouldn’t be being wasted in sending out and resending countless emails to the police and local councillors?

It is nice that people now have a number for Sainsburys direct, but MCC should be fining them for every minute of their time wasted on this matter. Sainsbury’s should have someone soley employed scouring the streets for their errant trolleys. Oops, sorry, I forgot, we can’t upset the supermarkets can we? They are the only businesses making a profit to pay tax on right now!!

I do hope they send it to Sainbury’s.

A hidden gem in the city: Heaven Spa at the Manchester Hilton

 

Heaven Spa at Manchester Hilton

Popped over the the Hilton Heaven Spa last week to put up some blinds in the blue room, plus to take some photos for them to use for press and pr. The re-dsign has been an on-going process, and is almost there now, just a few finishing touches. Beavered away on the images over the weekend and am really pleased with them, but still need to get some wide shots of the full rooms. Hard when clients are in and out for massages, manicures and other delights…. plus you can never just take a picture of a room as it is naturally, there is always so much photographic cheating required! What looks good to the naked eye doesn’t necessarily look good through the lens of the camera. In fact, it very rarely looks good through the lens of the camera.

Pleased with these detail shots so far though.

 

Heaven Spa at the Manchester Hilton

Heaven Spa at the Manchester Hilton

Heaven Spa at the Hilton Manchester

Heaven Spa at the Manchester Hilton